Many women in labor ask some variation of this question. When you're in the middle of a major transition and it get's tough it's natural at some level to just want it to be over.
I've definitely had my transitional moments during the birth of this project (my third child). The last few months have been hard on a lot of levels. Now I can finally see the light.
We locked the picture just before Christmas! No more RC (Rough Cut) or FC (Fine Cut). We moved on to PL (Picture Lock--one of the many acronyms I had never heard of prior to this crash course in filmmaking). Now all that's left are the finishing touches.
Settling on the ending was probably the hardest part. We kept hearing from test audiences that it didn't feel quite resolved or finished at the end. We moved things around, changed lines, images. Still, it didn't feel quite right. I was frantically texting the team the night before we locked.
I felt a little like my two year old, wanting to screen it, "Just one more time," and get more feedback. But at some point it's time to make a decision and move on. In the end, it all came back to the beginning.
Tell your story.
That call is a big part of what led me to create this film. I went to a screening of Birth Story with Ina Mae Gaskin when I was pregnant with my daughter. During the Q&A I asked her what we as women and healthcare providers could do to shift the culture of birth and make this kind of birth accessible to more women. Her answer was simple, "Tell your story."
I know it's not over yet, but it feels good to have come this far and know that we're telling a story that needs to be told.