In a dim hospital room, a contraction ended and my wife slumped back in bed. The doctor relaxed her grip on the vacuum pump and turned to a nurse, directing her to prepare for c-section. Crouched between my wife and the doctor, I felt control over my first son’s birth slipping away. I locked eyes with our doula for strength, turned to the doctor and said, “Wait, give her more time.” 

As men we too often assume that our partners know what to expect, but in truth pregnancy and birth are still confounding to most prospective moms. It takes an incredible amount of research, dedication, and bravery to develop an informed understanding of the process.